We usually call the time between two events “in the meantime”. That time between what was and what is to be can truly be a mean time. In the days and weeks following a highly stressful circumstance, such Hurricane Ian, it is normal to experience things like mental confusion, difficulty concentrating, fatigue, sadness, numbness, uncertainty, lack of purpose, and anxiety. Many of these symptoms resolve on their own after a few weeks. In situations where these symptoms persist, it may be wise to seek counsel from a professional.
These five action steps can help you thrive in the meantime as you walk through the recovery process.
Step #1: Give Grace
Give grace, to yourself and others. This may mean lowering your high expectations while in recovery mode. Service providers are unexpectedly and extraordinarily in demand, in addition to needing to care for their own homes. Be patient and kind when seeking repair quotes and recovery services.
Be careful of “shoulding” on people. “They should be working harder.” “We should be at a better place by now.” “I should be volunteering to help others more.” We rarely have all the information that would help us understand why things aren’t progressing as quickly as we think they ought to be. Be kind to yourself as you consider how much you ought to be accomplishing. You’ve been through a traumatic event.
Step #2: Manage Tasks
It’s easy to be overwhelmed with the number of tasks crying out for your attention. Take a few minutes to write down all the tasks that need to be done. Prioritize them based on importance and urgency. Determine if any can be delegated to others, or postponed. Set a goal to accomplish one or two tasks a day. Reward yourself once you accomplish your goal with a nap, a walk with a friend, a bath, or a few moments of solitude.
With so many things to accomplish, it might seem overwhelming to think about helping others at this time. Consider how serving others with your talents and resources might help lift your spirits and help you feel more connected to your community and the recovery efforts.
Step #3: Make Room for Feelings
Stressful situations usually elicit strong emotional responses, which is completely normal. Fear, anger, confusion, and anxiety are some of the common suspects. Emotions know no timeline, so if they are stuffed down now they will come out later, usually at the worst time and often disguised as another emotion. Take time to process what you’ve been through. Cry when you feel like crying. Talk about the experience with trusted friends and family. Listen to the experiences of others, validating those feelings, even if they are different from how you are feeling. It’s also common to feel conflicting emotions. The emotional tug-of-war between gratitude for God’s protection and sadness over what has been lost is real, but that tension doesn’t invalidate either feeling.
Step #4: Make Life Easier
Things that used to happen on autopilot may become difficult or confusing after a stressful event. Use your GPS even when driving to familiar places. Street signs and landmarks may be missing and your mind might wander when you are driving. Set up your morning routine products in the order you use them, such as your shower items or makeup. The order of the items will remind you what normally comes next. Ask someone to double check important entries and applications for accuracy. Leverage wise counsel to avoid decision fatigue when there is a mountain of decisions to make. Ask Alexa to remind you to pick the kids up from school or set an alarm on your phone.
Step #5: Practice Moderation in All Things, Even Moderation
Digesting a steady stream of news, videos, and social media posts regarding the event is not advisable. Take breaks from the constant information stream. Overindulging in unhealthy distraction techniques such as alcohol or food can bring more problems than solutions. If it happens, give yourself grace and find healthier options, such as praying, reading, exercising, writing, or spending time alone or with others.
Using these steps can help you thrive as you bridge the gap between the current chaos and the new normal that’s certain to come. In the meantime, be kind to yourself and one another.
